poetry

Repeat Repeat Repeat

Originally written as a spoken word poem

Tell me again, Love,
why we were so confined.
I have it memorised, trust me but repeat.
repeat, hear, beg for a repeat, repeat. Rewind rewind, rewind.

Can you simplify it, Love?
I’m always drunk when it needs repeating, so simplify a little more.
You know I can’t leave it alone
You know I won’t believe it’s done.

Then where will be be?

Sober I’m red faced, can’t ask, what a waste,
The thing is that I have it memorised:
sober, drunk, asleep, unaware, insane, angry, upset –
every repeat like a hit,

“We were both messed up back then, and now it’s too late.”

Missed chances, shitty counselling and prescription pills.
Then: university – opposite ends of the country,
and I’m smoking, drinking, joking, not able to pay the bills.
You never reply, you never pick up and soon I forget to try.
I watch our collective inability to wait, converse, date.

‘We were both messed up back then, and now it’s too late’.

I hate begging for the repeat, but I need it,
particularly at a bus stop, 3AM on New Year ’s eve,
last time I’ll see you for months, and the thought’s too hard to conceive.
So with the memories of midnight imprinted on our lips
I’m gonna need our excuse

Because hey: ‘We were both messed up back then, and now it’s too late’.

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